In loving memory of my nontraditional father Mario
I am honored and proud to say this is my 4th year celebrating Father’s Day. I did not become the father of 3 the traditional way. Our oldest daughter and two younger sons came to be a part of our family through adoption and assistive reproduction.
They say becoming a father changes you and this is true is many ways. You have more stress, more responsibility, more things to think about every day, and many times you are pushed to your physical, emotional and financial limits. However, when I stop and take a chance to admire and enjoy the moments I realize how truly blessed I am to be a father. I know many of you out there who are new fathers, old fathers, and soon to be fathers but more than anything I wanted to share a few words for those out there who want to be fathers and are struggling to become fathers.
As many of you who have struggled with fertility challenges or continue to struggle with infertility can attest too two of the hardest days to deal with during the year are Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. As much as my wife and I wanted to have children we struggled for years and years before all the pain, heartache, emotional and financial roller-coaster finally led way to our daughter who came to our family right before Father’s Day 4 years ago. While she wasn’t biologically conceived by us in the traditional manner she is in every sense of the word our daughter. I am blessed to be her father just has I have been blessed with two sons who also came to be a part of our family in the nontraditional ways.
For those of you out there struggling to become fathers or mothers please know that you are not alone. There will be emotional, physical and financial sacrifices along the way just as there will be sacrifices when you are a parent. Becoming a father the nontraditional way is no greater than or less than becoming a father the traditional way it just requires a different type of struggle. However, the little tiny moments have been worth it all. The struggle, sacrifice and often times heartaches is worth the outcome. Don’t give up hope. What you wish, want and hope for in this moment will come true with time and effort.
Happy Father’s Day to all fathers especially those who have become fathers the nontraditional ways and those who are yet to become fathers.
Justin M. Keppinger: is a surrogacy, adoption and a family building attorney who you can find at www.oregonsurrogacyandadoptionlaw.com or email: firstname.lastname@example.org